Man, as if I don't think about having a baby enough during the day, the thoughts have to continue to bother me while I'm sleeping! I think every night this week I've had some kind of being pregnant dream, or taking a test dream, a miscarriage dream, or an infertility dream. Seriously, and they are so real!
Just last night I had 2 dreams. The first one, I was taking a pregnancy test and it immediately was positive. I was going to go show it to my mom and it blew out of my hand and I went running after it. And for some reason there were no more pregnancy tests to be bought, so no one would believe me that I was pregnant. Weird. LOL. Then, at some point I woke up and went back to sleep.
The next dream I had was me trying to take my temperatures but my thermometer wouldn't go above 95 degrees. I swore up and down that I was pregnant but every test I took came up with an invalid result. Talk about frustrating!!
I woke up this morning sort of discouraged. I had no luck in my dreams and then I got to take my temperature for real and it's still high, but I'd like it to be higher. I really wish I could dream about something else!! I just feel so overwhelmed and even obsessed, and I really am trying NOT to be. As soon as a thought creeps into my mind I push it out, I'd go crazy if I didn't.
But being discouraged this morning brought out my ranty feelings that I try to suppress. I know I shouldn't feel like I am owed anything in this life, but I can't help but feel like it's my time to get what we've been trying for and praying for for 14 months now! I know it's wrong to be jealous of others who have what I want, but it makes me crazy to hear "We weren't even trying" or "All he has to do is look at me and I get pregnant." I feel like I have made every right choice I possibly could with my life, and that I've got my ducks in a row financially and with health insurance... My heart has so much room left to love another baby or several babies, and it is so hard having to deal with this struggle. It really is. Ugh. Sorry guys, just ranting a little.
And if you are one of those who got pregnant first try or on accident and you think I'm being rude or spiteful, I'm really not. I just hate how SOME people take their ability and gift of getting and staying pregnant for granted. I would totally wish for all the morning sickness in the world, the dry hair, the weight gain, the uncomfortable-ness, I'd take it all and never complain because it is literally a miracle that you are pregnant. I will never take it for granted.
Anyways, that's my 9DPO rant. Thanks for bearing with me! :)
Ok. 8 DPO today... nothing different as far as how I am feeling. But here's my blog idea for the day.
How to Tell the Daddy to be, that he's a Daddy to be:
This is something that requires some patience and creativity. I have absolutely none of the former. Everytime I've gotten a Positive test (note, I've had 5 of them), I've been too excited to keep it a secret from the hubby. When I found out last June I was expecting, I was taking advantage of the fact my hubby was taking the dog out, so i had about 3 minutes to pee on a stick, so I did and as soon as he came in the front door, "pregnant" popped up on the screen and I grabbed it and basically shoved it in his face with excitement. LOL. But, I am determined, when I do get a BFP, to keep it to myself for as long as it takes to get this idea done:
When I get a BFP, I am going to drive to IF when the hubby working, and fill his car with pink and blue balloons. In 1 balloon, I'll stick the PG Test inside it and write "POP ME" on it. I'll mix it in with the other balloons. Then, I'll get some of that car window paint and write on his windows telling him to pop all the balloons to find a surprise. Eventually, he'll find the test.
Isn't that a fun idea? I just hope I'll be able to contain myself long enough to accomplish it! LOL.
But, I may be getting ahead of myself... I still have no inkling of whether or not I am or not, but isn't that a fun idea?
Other ideas I've heard and considered are:
1. Writing "Hi Daddy" on your belly and finding some way to expose it to the hubby.
2. Getting Cohen a "I'm gonna be a big brother" shirt and have him wear it around Daddy.
3. Wrapping the test up and call it an early b-day, christmas, v-day present...
4. Just writing it on his car windows.
What are some other ideas?
This post is merely for my own curiosity, as I was in the pharmacy aisle today I saw a over the counter at-home fertility test. Basically, you pee on the stick like a pregnancy or ovulation kit and it tells you if you can get pregnant or not. I was instantly curious. Now, I don't consider myself to be infertile by any means, I mean I dont seem to have the issue of GETTING pregnant, my issue lies in STAYING pregnant, but for all those women out there who are TTC for a year or more might worry if they are or not. If you are under 35, and healthy, and same with your spouse, you would want to see a fertility specialist after atleast a year of not conceiveing. If you are over 35, they say after 6 months of TTC you should see one. But in the meantime, if you are on like your 8th month TTC, and you wanna take matters into your own hands, you may wanna take one of these:
How does it work? According to the FirstResponse Website, this fertility test measures the amount of Follicle Stimulating Hormone, (FSH), in your urine. FSH is a hormone that is directly connected to your ovaries and egg production. It tells your body to produce an egg. If your levels are normal, you have enough eggs to consider yourself fertile. If your FSH is elevated, that means your body is producing more of the hormone to convince your body to prepare and release an egg, meaning you don't have very many or have a limited supply. Wow, betcha never realized your urine could tell you so many things!How and when do you take it?On day 3 of your cycle. So, you should take this while on your period. This is the prime time to take this test. Hold it in your urine stream for 5 seconds, replace cap, and wait 30 minutes. Yes, it's longer than a pregnancy test, but I think this process is a little more in-depth. After the 30 minutes have passed you will see either one line or two. This is one test where you want to see only ONE line! That means your FSH levels are normal and you have enough eggs to be considered fertile. If you see two lines, it means there is an elevated amount of FSH and so you may have a low supply of eggs and you might consider seeing a fertility specialist. Does it Work?Now that's the million dollar question. I think it accurately detects the FSH hormone. I don't it lies about that in it's claim to 95% accuracy. I think that's true. However, not all fertility issues lie in egg production. There several things that contribute to infertility such as PCOS, Endometriosis, even being over/underweight, low progesterone levels, and so much more. And according to www. MedicineNet.com only 1/3 of infertility cases are because of female issues. Would I Recommend?If you are healthy, have no signs or history of PCOS, Endometriosis, or other things that can interfere with fertility, then I say go for it. If anything it is a way to rule out one possible cause and give you a sense of relief in that department. But I could caution that you take your result with a grain of salt, because just like in a pregnancy test, there could be false positives, or false negatives. If you have $25-40 to spare it couldn't hurt. But if you are doing it to avoid seeing a fertility specialist, it won't save you money in the long run, because you should see one anyways regardless of your result.I don't think I will buy one though. If you have tried one, please let me know your experience.
This is something that I, as a TTCer, think is VERY cool. When I saw it, I don't know why, but I was excited. It just shows how much science is progressing and before we know it, we'll know as soon as we get pregnant, that we are!
This is the NEW Clearblue DIGITAL Pregnancy Test with Conception Indicator. Not only does it tell you if you are pregnant or not without having to worry about faint lines or evaporation lines, but it also will tell you roughly how pregnant you are!! Like a normal pregnancy test, it detects the pregnancy hormone hCG in your urine. This baby also calculates the concentration of it (hCG should double every 48 hours in a healthy pregnancy) to determine roughly how far along you are. I can see it being a little off for some women because some don't produce high amounts of hCG during pregnancy, and if you are pregnant with multiple babies it might tell you you are further along than you are. But still, it's very cool. Just another thing from my friends at Clearblue! I don't use any other test but their digitals!!
I've heard some women say they are found at their Walmarts, but others say it's only available in the UK. I have found them on ebay, but have yet to check Walmart. If any of you readers have found them somewhere let me know!!
