17 Weeks!

Today I am 17 weeks! Awesome! Everything is going great (knock on wood) and baby is growing and kicking even more! I even felt a kick from the outside the other day! I am doing much better from the whole stomach issue last week. I am so glad too, because that was horrible! I am on winter break from school and I don't have to work this weekend, so I am just enjoying some lazy time!

Baby's kicks are getting stronger, and when I bend over, I can definitely feel my uterus getting in the way now! Won't be long before I can't even tie my shoes! Maybe I should paint my toes soon? lol. Just a few more weeks until we find out the gender! I'll take a 17wk picture later, my camera battery is dead, but there's not much difference from the last one I dont think. I am kinda glad I'm not showing as rapidly as I thought I was. I'm glad that was just pregnancy bloat because I thought I was going to be huge! Total weight gain (minus what I lost last week) is 1lb. I think I need to gain a little bit more, but since I am feeling the baby and his/her heartbeat is strong I am not too worried.

My 20 week ultrasound is on the 11th, and I am very nervous about it. I am starting to convince myself baby is sticking around, but I keep telling myself I won't be sure until that ultrasound. Once I have it, I'll be pretty confident. It's sad I am so afraid to let my guard down and start planning for baby. I don't want it to be ripped from me suddenly again... so I am very guarded. Sucks I know, but I am making slow preparations for baby.

I already purchased an extra carseat base for our 2nd car. My good friend Linda gave me these drawers for baby clothes, and a baby play mat. She also gave me a ton of formula, which is liquid gold in my eyes...That is going to save me a ton! I haven't bought any clothes, I want to wait till I find out the gender first, but this is slowly starting to become more real!

16 weeks

Wow! We're getting closer to the half way mark already! The first several weeks creeped by, but now it's starting to speed along! This past monday I started having severe abdominal pains, and they are still going on, but not as bad. They were all into my back and stomach, and I would get these waves of horrible pain and I honestly thought I was having contractions. I talked to my doctor and they were able to rule out pre-labor because my cervix was still closed, so they thought maybe it was a kidney infection or kidney stones. They ruled that out, and have no settled on it being gastritis, basically an inflamed stomach and other digestive organs. They gave me some ideas to help it, and so far they are helping. They also told me I should probably avoid spicy foods, which sucks, because that is all I want to eat. But oh well, I'd do anything to not feel that pain again. It was awful.

Anyways, I lost 2 lbs since my last appt, and baby's heartbeat was 160. Doc says my headaches and leg cramps are normal, which I already knew, and we scheduled my anatomy ultrasound for January 11th! I can't wait!

15 Weeks

Tomorrow I am officially 15 weeks! That is amazing! So far, the second trimester is nice and smooth sailing. I never had cravings before with my son, or any of my other pregnancies, that is, but they are rearing their head lately. I can't stop thinking about Taco Bell or Buffalo Wings. I just need them. As I'm cooking dinner (potato casserole) I am dreaming about chugging the can of enchilada sauce in the cabinet. Not only is it spicy, but it's pickles too, so bitter/sour? Don't worry I'm not wanting to combine them yet! As of my WIC appt this last week I've gained 3.5lbs in the first trimester. My belly doesn't stick out as far, must have been bloat. Baby is doing great, has a strong heartbeat, and every now and then I feel a kick or a wiggle!! It's so exciting!! I just love this little one so much!

14 weeks and counting!

So this is my 12 week picture, and I don't look any different, maybe even smaller. I think a lot of that was bloat or something. I don't think my baby is shrinking lol. I don't feel nearly as much pressure in there, so I'm guessing a lot if it was bloat. But my uterus is definitely growing and my uterus is getting harder. It definitely won't be long till there is a solid pooch there!

So I'm 14week and 2 days, and I am so excited and scared. It feels like uncharted territory because I feel I am no stranger to the first trimester, but I've only been this far along with one other pregnancy...My son's!! It's been over 3 years since I've been in this spot and I am so scared something will go wrong. My doppler has saved my mind so many times!

The cravings have started. I crave taco bell and buffalo wings 24/7. Its crazy!! The hotter the better too. I like all things spicy and bitter and sour. Last week at work I could not stop thinking about pickles. lol. I guess that makes me a typical preggo lady?? I go in for another appointment in 2 weeks, I am hoping to convince my doc to let me do an ultrasound for the gender before Christmas. That would be awesome!! BTW a few posts down I tried to attach a recording of baby's heartbeat, but couldn't get it to work, so I took a video and here it is!

By the way, we have a boys name picked out. Spencer Jacob Morris, and we'll call him Jake, or as Spencer want to, SJ. I kinda like it...But I will be calling him Jake. If it's at boy, that is For a girl I am LOVING Quinn, but can't think of a good middle name. We also like Carly, and Ily (ee-lee). Spencer doesnt want to do middle names, but I kinda thing they are important! Any suggestions?

So I've blogged about the pregnancy since finding out, so if you have time there are several blog posts about it...the most recent first!

12 weeks!

Well, I'm 12 weeks!!! Well, 12 weeks 1 day to be exact, and I just heard his/her heartbeat!! This is a huge milestone! Why? Not only does my chance of miscarriage go down to 1%... but 12w 1d is 1 day later than the baby I lost at 14 weeks lived. (Baby died at 12 weeks, and I didn't loose it until 14). I am so excited! I am still keeping it hush for atleast another week. We'll tell all our families at Thanksgiving, and then announce it on facebook at 14 weeks, so you will get to read these soon! I'm still about 30% nervous about it, just because of the late loss I had before, but so far things are looking great. Strong heartbeat in the 160s! I feel pregnant. Really, I am already so uncomfortable with this belly, I feel like I'm 30 weeks. I am not complaining by any means. I think I am sporting a baby bump, and it's kinda fun. My clothes are getting tighter, and I found out yesterday I've already gained 5lbs!! Crazy!! I only gained 19 total with my son!

I also have a hernia, it's an umbillical hernia right above my belly button. It hurts sometimes, but the doc said there's nothing they can do during pregnancy, and even in my childbearing years, because even if I get it fixed, another pregnancy would pop it out again. It's not too bad yet, it just might protrude outta my big belly later. Doc says I can quit the progesterone at any time now, I think I might take it a few extra weeks just in case, afterall I do have another month's worth of pills. She said it wouldn't harm the baby to take it longer.

Well that's the update for now! TTFN!

To BF or not to BF?

Ok, so ever since I got a BFP my mind has been wheeling with plans. I originally wasn't going to use a crib (mainly because we had one for Cohen but never used it really..we used a bassinet and pack and play, he moved onto a twin bed at 18 months). So we sold our crib about a year ago, and my SIL has offered theirs to me. I have to say, I am excited to get some new bedding (gonna make my own) and decorate! Another thing on my mind was cloth diapering. And it's really not realisitic for me right now, I am so busy I don't think I would be able to do it, so I'll probably bite the bullet and use disposables. I've heard many people say they cause burns and rashes, but Cohen has never had a problem with either, so I'm not too worried about it.

I can't decided if I am going to breastfeed or not. Now save me the lectures that "breast is best" I KNOW that. With Cohen I tried and tried to breastfeed, and it just did not happen. My milk came in, but would not come out no matter how much help I got from LLL and the lactation consultants at WIC and at the hospital. So, we switched to formula and he thrived on it. I know breast is best, but I don't see a problem with formula. I really don't. I still got that "bonding time" with my little one, and DH got it too, because he was able to feed him too! He's always been super healthy and always digested it easily. And I can't help argue the convenience of it. Since I am in school and working, I would not have time at work to stop and pump every 3 hours to keep my supply up. I was able to take Cohen with me anywhere and feed him whereever.

I think I will try it again, we'll see what happens, but I am not against formula feeding, and I plan on buying a few cans here and there of formula, to build up stock before baby comes. So, this post isn't asking for opinions or comments, I dont need to hear them. I know it can be a touchy subject and some might see me as having selfish reasons for not BFing, but I don't. Like anything else regarding my child, it's my decision and I'll do whats' right for myself and my family.

11 Weeks-ish

Today I am just over 11 weeks! It is going by fast and slow at the same time. I feel like my uterus is definitely growing. It's a good sign that baby is too, but it also scares me because I feel like I already look 20 weeks preggo! I think it might be time to do some light exersizing to make sure I don't gain too much weight. My next appointment is on Thursday so we'll see how much weight I've gained (I dont trust our bathroom scale to be too accurate). The clip posted above (I hope it works) is of baby's heartbeat I recorded from my doppler. I love hearing this every day!

I have been sick and therefore miserable because my options for medicine are soo limited. I've taken nothing, but my stuffy nose is going to kill me! I am starting to get a cough too and I feel just so rotten. I even called in sick to work tomorrow, I don't think I should be working in a hospital right now. I hope to goodness I get well enough by Sunday. My appetite is pretty much non existant, I have to force myself to eat which sucks. I am also still on my progesterone pills for atleast a few more weeks.

With the babe I lost a 14 weeks, they told me the baby died at 12 weeks exactly. If i can get past that week and hear the heartbeat every day, you can bet a load will be lifted off my shoulders!

I keep starting to think about what baby needs, and I am feeling that it is a girl. One lady on craiglist offered to sell me her extra car seat base so we dont have to switch our one back and forth. My SIL is giving me a crib and lots of baby girl clothes, so I am excited. Can't wait to find out what it is, a little over 2 months left!! Oh, BTW, here's a 10 week pic.

10.5 weeks

Well, I'm about 10 1/2 weeks now. I am definitely feeling the stretching in my tummy. Some days is hurts so bad! I found the baby's heartbeat with my fetal doppler this week, I think it was on Friday afternoon. I'd been trying to find it daily since I hit the 9 week mark, and I would search low in my abdomen near the bone, and nothing. So, I was about to give up and suddenly I heard it!! It was a strong 160-170 bpm! I've been able to find it every day since then! I am so glad I got this doppler, it helps ease my mind. But I did discover that baby is higher up in my abdomen than I thought. Linda says I already have a belly and I definitely feel like I do. DH doesnt think so, but I feel like my belly is already stretched to its limits!! I usually do not have an appetite, and when I do it lasts for like 2 seconds. That is annoying. However, we went to Wingers last night and I got buffalo wings and loved it!!

Headaches

So the last 2 days I have had a major, brainsplitting headache. I have tried everything to get rid of it. Heating pad, hot bath and shower, head massage, tylenol, drinking lots of water, you name it, and it will NOT go away. When I stand or move my head it throbs. It throbs so hard I can practically hear it. I don't know what else to do. If I still have it when I wake up in the morning, I am calling my doctor, because I am miserable.

One thing that ticks me off is certain people's reaction about this pregnancy. When I mention something that's happening they say "Didn't you get that symptom right before you miscarried?" It's really frustrating that everyone seems to to think it's going to happen again. Don't you think I worry about that enough to not have you add to it? This is not the first incident someone's said something like that. I am praying and trying to hold on to this pregnancy with everything I have.

I do have to admit that I feel very lucky with the outcome of the spotting thing. I can't tell you how many times I have heard from people that I know who are pregnant who started bleeding that they ended up being fine, and that for the first time, it finally was me that was fine. Thank goodness!

A little scare

Well today I am 9 weeks, and we had a scare this morning. Before school today I discovered a little bit of spotting. I paniced and called my doctor immediately and they told me to come in. So I did and man was I a wreck. DH doesnt have a cell phone so I couldn't call him, so I sat there alone, crying in the car and doc office thinking the worst and being so mad and jealous that I couldn't carry a baby to save my life. So, they were able to squeeze me in for an ultrasound.

Guess what! baby is fine! They said he/she is growing perfect, heartbeat was 180, and he/she was wiggling all over the screen and even waved at me! I cried when I saw the flicker of the heart, I couldn't believe what I was seeing. They looked around at other things trying to find the reason for the spotting and they couldn't find one. They said everything still looked perfect. Hallelujah!

They encouraged me to take the prometrium they prescribed me two weeks ago, and I felt like a total idiot for ignoring the prescription for so long. My next appt is scheduled for 12 weeks and they said to just play it day by day but they dont see anything pointing to an impending miscarriage. I am still very nervous about it. I've felt a lot of pressure in my uterine area and though it's probably just growing pains, I'm terrified. So far though, no spotting since this morning. Lets hope it stays that way! Anyways, enjoy the pics. Baby is measuring 9weeks 1day and 2.38cm! Heartbeat was 180...I'm really thinking girl.

I also told DH's mom and dad about it. so far it had been a secret, but we needed all the prayers we could get so I told them.

9 weeks

Well, I am now about 1 day shy of being 9 weeks! How amazing is that?? Everything is going so smoothly and I have been given a few gentle reminders that I do indeed have a baby growing in there!!

I had my first appointment almost 2 weeks ago, I was 7 weeks and was given an ultrasound. We got to see baby and see it's heartbeat! That was exciting and a huge milestone for me. The last 2 I lost I never had an ultrasound. It was just a little blob about the size of a grain of rice, but it had a thriving heartbeat of 160! I think it's a girl, partly because of the heartbeat, but mainly just a feeling. Here's a pic!

My doctor is amazing. I am seeing the gal who delivered Cohen and handled both recent miscarriages. She knows my history well and she is doing everything she can to ease my mind, including giving me all the ultrasounds I want early on. So I am having another on Thursday.

I am already starting to show. Crazy huh? With Cohen I didn't start showing until around 20 weeks, but I definitely have a pooch that wasn't there before. All my clothes are fitting much tighter and while I love it, I hate it since it is still supposed to be a secret!

6 weeks

Well, I have decided to blog about this pregnancy, but not post the blogs until after I announce the news to everyone. Tomorrow I will be 6 weeks pregant. It feels like I've known forever!! These first few weeks are creeping by and I am just dying for them to speed up a little. However, everyday seems like a little victory in itself, because it's another day that I've kept the pregnancy. I am still very paranoid every time I go to the bathroom that I'll find blood or that every cramp or pulling is a bad sign, but so far so good. I have been EXTREMELY tired with this one. Maybe the last two were too long ago, but I do not remember being this tired. True, I'm also in school and working weekends and have a crazy 2.5 year old, but I could literally sleep all day. Thats the only thing I could complain about though. I feel great, only a little nauseus every now and then, but overall I feel the same just sleepy!

I've told a few people about the pregnancy, mainly to keep my sanity in tact from not being able to tell people about it. DH didn't know I told my mom about it, and the other day I was skyping her and we were talking about it and he came running into the room with this look on his face like "how dare you??" lol. oops.

First appointment is a week from tomorrow! I am assuming I'll have an ultrasound, and I can't wait!! I'll be 7weeks 2 days so we should definitely see a heartbeat! I purchased a fetal doppler, so once the baby gets to be around 12 weeks I should be able to listen at home! anywho, thats all for now!

Pregnant!

So, I am trying to keep this pregnancy a secret, and I am busting at the seams wanting to tell people and blog about it. So I've decided to blog about it, but save the blogs as drafts. When I finally do decided to announce it, I'll post all my bloggings up until then so it's like I blogged from the beginning!!

So anyways, I'm pregnant!! It still feels so surreal to me! I found out on Sep. 20th, a week ago. I had a feeling I was, but didn't want to get my hopes up. I took a dollar store test at 10dpo and got the faintest line ever on it. I ended up taking 3 more that day because I thought that first faint line might have been an evap line. Well, on all 3 there were faint lines. So Monday I picked up a First Response and took it mid-day (couldn't wait!) and sure enough there was a 2nd line. It was faint, but it was there!! So I was ecstatic and drove to DH's work and came in and said, "I just wanted to ask you a question, how do you feel about sharing your birthday?" It took him a second to put it together and had this look of unbelief, shock, and he looked like he got choked up. He said "No way." And I handed him the test to prove it. I am so excited. Everything is going great so far (knock on wood). My first appointment is on Oct 14th, so a little over 2 weeks away. Im nervous about it, and terrified every day that I am going to loose it.

Most of you know I am LDS and I am so blessed for that. My DH gave me a priesthood blessing the night we found out. I was so terrified to loose this one. In the blessing, DH was very in tune with the spirit I think. The one thing that really stuck out to me was that "The timing is right." I have to keep telling myself that over and over again. I really feel like this one is a keeper, but I am trying very hard to have faith!

We've told Cohen already, don't know why really. He will point to my belly and tell me his sister is in there. (haha). He is adorable. He told me we should name his sister Cohen. Today I asked him where the baby is, he points to his stomach and says, "In there." I said, what's your baby's name? He said, Her name's Hungry." LOL. Too hilarious!!

Only a few people know about the pregnancy, mainly my parents, and my 4 closest friends. They are sworn to secrecy. We don't know when we are going to announce it. I think it will be after the 14wk mark, but we will see how things go .

Bitterness and Symtoms

Hey all. Today I am having one of my ranty bitter days. I am trying not to be, but I am. It just puts me in a world of roller coaster emotions when someone I know announces they are pregnant. It really does make me happy and excited- Trust me, I don't wish death on you or anything, I just get kinda bummed for myself. Today yet another person announced they are pregnant with #3. They have been married 3 months longer than DH and I and are already on #3!! I just wanna start on number 2. Is that really so much to ask? Bleh.

And again, I am not mad or unhappy for those preggo people, honestly. I am sooo happy and excited for you and it's not like I don't want you to tell me about it...I do!! I love hearing about preggo people and seeing ultrasound pics. It reminds me what is coming my way... EVENTUALLY. Ugh. I am such a grump about this, and I hate it. I wish there was no bitter side to people announcing they are pregnant, I truely am working on it!

Anyways, as for the update on me... Currently 8dpo. Any symptoms? Who the heck know. There have been months where I swore I had every symptom in the book and turned out I had nada. All I know this time around, is that I ovulated 4 days earlier than usual, but we had several days around that point covered, so the timing should be spot on... The only thing I could call "symptoms" is I have been super tired (could be blamed on the remenants of my mono, or the fact I have a 2.5 year old, or that fact that I am a full time student, or that I just got a job...or all that combined.) and that my boobs are kinda sore. I've heard that the blue lines on them get more prominent when preggers, and last night they looked like roadmaps (sorry if there are any gentlemen reading this, this is a TTC blog, so get over it lol)... so thats cool...but I could attribute the sore boobies to the progesterone cream I have started using twice a day. And my abdomen has felt like a balloon stretched to its limits. right now it doesn't but last night it was so uncomfortably bloated. I'm not complaining though! Oh well, just a few more days and we'll know!!

P.S. If this IS the month, I'll be due right around DH's bday...then I wont have to buy him anything. lol. hehe

progesterone cream

I picked up some progesterone cream at the health store yesterday. I've done some reading about the benefits of natural progesterone, and I thought I would give it a try. This is how it works: As soon as you ovulate, your body starts producing progesterone. This hormone helps to build up the lining of the uterus to make it ideal for implantation. Sometimes women don't have enough progesterone, or too much estrogen and it makes implantation nealry impossible. With taking supplements or using creams, it just helps to supplement your natural progesterone and ensure the lining of the uterus is good for implantation. So after driving all over creation to find some, I found some, bought it and applied. It says to apply it to areas where the circulation is good, like the wrists, neck, throat, inner thighs, feet, etc... or in places where the skin is thin. It absorbs into the subcutaneous layer (how's that for big words?? I learned it in Anat & phys, and now can use it in a sentance! cool huh?) which is basically the fat underneath your skin, and then feeds into the bloodstream, spreading it through your body.

I haven't noticed any affects or changes, but this has only been day 2 of using it, I imagine it will take a little longer if I do experience anything. But, it's not only supposed to help my uterine lining, but it should help balance excessive estrogen and help my cycles regulate, and be less painful, and lessen the affects of PMS (husbands are happy dancing everywhere for that one!) The cream I chose is 22mg of progesterone per dose, which is 1/2tsp. Not too much.

And for those who say, is that safe?? Yes it's safe. It is a natural hormone your body produces. It's generally safe to take while pregnant (though you should consult your doctor) your body in it's 3rd trimester actually produces over 400mg of progesterone a day, so 22mg isn't really a whole lot. While it's not a replacement, it's a supplement.

If you do take it to become pregnant, and you do. DO NOT STOP TAKING IT as it could induce a miscarriage, the sudden drop in progesterone levels (the sudden drop causes your period to start every month.) They advise you continue use until 12 weeks, then slowly taper off the cream. But it is safe to take all pregnacy. Good stuff to know huh?

Anyways, that's whats happening in the TTC world. I ovulated several days earlier than usual the past 2 months. Weird. But we'll see how it goes. I am already 6 DPO! Its going by fast!

For more info on using progesterone cream, just search google about it, there's tons out there!

Hello Friends

Hello friends, sorry I've been MIA for a while, it just doesn't make much sense blogging about TTC when you are trying to get your mind off of it. We've taken a couple months break, and have decided to give it another go... but only for September and October. As a lot of you know I go to school, so we think it would be best to have the baby in between semesters, so we have 2 months where the due date will fall at a good time. So here's hoping we have an easy time this time!!

DH and I have had MANY discussions over the past few months about having another, and DH is mainly worried about financial aspects. He has been overthinking everything, he thought we'd have to move if we had another baby because we only have a 2 bedroom apartment. I told him the beauty of little kids is they can share a room for a while, even if one's a boy and one's a girl.

My son, loves to be around someone at all times. No matter what I am doing, he will follow right behind me and the same with DH. I think he needs a brother or sister to hang out with.

We decided yesterday to start TTC again, and I am just elated! I've been wanting to get back into it for a while, but DH always had a reason not to. I guess maybe he ran out, because he agreed to yesterday, under the 2 month condition.

In other news, I've recieved a scholarship to take a doula training program, and I am super excited about it!! It's got me considering natural childbirth and birthing centers, and I haven't even started the course!! I will start it at the end of the month.

I am looking for jobs in my area, and applied for a CNA job in labor and delivery and would be delieriously happy to get that, but the HR lady said I probably wouldn't get it due to my lack of experience. Grrr. I think I have more experience with pregnancy and women's health than any other CNA. Oh well.

That's it for now.... lets hope this is a good month for TTC!!!

Arrested.

On July 29th, 2010 at 12:00pm, I will be arrested. Yep, handcuffed, put into the back of a police car, and taken to jail. My bail is set at $1,000.

I've chosen to participate in the March of Dimes Jail and Bail program. I guess it is something they do every year to raise money, and Spencer turned me in for "Being a busy Mom." Since I am guilty, and March of Dimes is a cause I strongly support, I've decided to go for it and try to raise some money for them. How do I raise the money?? By my bail! I have till the 29th of July to try and raise $1000 dollars for bail. I will be rotting away in jail (aka Texas Roadhouse).

I've never done any kind of fund raising like this before, but I believe $1000 is a reachable goal. I've set up a personal website through the March of Dimes, where you can donate. If you are uncomfortable giving your info online, you can send me checks, money orders etc.

DID YOU KNOW:
March of Dimes is aUnited States health charity whose mission is to improve the health of babies by preventing birth defects, premature birth, and infant mortality.

In Idaho ALONE:
20,384 Babies are born every year?
2,444 are born to mothers who received inadequate care
1,352 are born with a low birth weight
2,496 are born PREMATURE
156 die before their first birthday.

Your donation to the March of Dimes will provide:
*Preconception and prenatal education for women
*Ultrasounds for all pregnant women to detect problems early
*Education to help health care providers treat and care for pregnant women and babies
*Community grants to support maternal/child health services
*Standardized newborn tests given to infants to save babies from treatable disease
*Surfactant therapy, a life saving breakthrough to help preemies breath
*Developments and improvements to NICUSs (Newborn Intensive Care Units) nationwide
*Funds research to prevent birth defects and premature birth.

To DONATE, please go to my fundraising site: http://jailandbail.marchofdimes.com/redheadedvalval

Song

Whether you are trying for your 1st or your 5th, fertility issues are no less painful to deal with.

Win Cloth Diapers!

Cloth Diapering

So, my last post sparked some comments about cloth diapering, and I was instantly curious. I know a few people who do the cloth diapering thing, but in my head, when I thought about cloth diapering, I thought of folding those little white "burp rags," safety pins, ugly rubber pants, and a LOT of work. I've never even considered it. Sure, buying huggies and luvs was pricey, but they were easy. Well, after reading those comments about cloth diapering, I decided to google cloth diapers and see what came up. Really I was looking for a how to for folding them, cleaning them, etc... but what I found was really exciting!

Cloth diapering as come a long way from what I thought. What I discovered were all in one cloth diapers, one size that fits all, and they were WAY cute!! Here's some stuff that I found. The initial up front cost would be higher, but they are all guaranteed to last atleast 2 years, which is great.

These below are Bumkin diapers. They run from about $15 and up. Look at all the cute prints!These are BABY AIO cloth diapers. I found them on ebay.com. There's a how-to video at the bottom of the ebay page. I love these! This particular lot has them going for $8 a diaper. That's a great price! Free shipping as well.This one is a bumgenius cloth diaper. This one has a velcro closure and comes in many colors. Looks like they also start around $15 a diaper.




There is also "Baby Love" diapers:


Those are just a few different brands and styles of cloth diapers, to see more, just google cloth diapers. I don't know which type I will go with, I am thinking bumgenius? Let me know what your thoughts are and what type you would suggest! I am really excited about this! Also, if you do cloth diaper, how many would you suggest one to buy starting out?

Looks like washing them is pretty simple...some styles you just throw the diaper in the washing machine, some you remove a liner and wash, some you remove the padding and wash, but overall they aren't nearly has painstaking as I thought they were. I think during the summers I would even hang them outside to dry to be even more green!

PS If anyone wants to donate their cloth diaper for me to review it, I'd be happy to! LOL

August

Every night this last week, I dreamed that I was pregnant. Literally. Every night. I have mixed feelings about these dreams, they are wonderful...while I am dreaming. In my dreams the financial worries are not there, so it is just a time of pure bliss. When I wake up, I'm bummed it was a dream, annoyed that I even had it because it does not make this not-trying thing any easier. But then again, I am glad it was just a dream, I really DO want to get things more stable before we add to our family.

Anyways, we've had our Sunday night talks every week now, and I kind of like having them. We go over our finances for the week which is nice, because I used to be the only one doing the finances and I would be really stressed when money got tight, and then when Spencer would find out how tight it was he would get mad at me for not telling him. This way we both work it out, come up with solutions, and it takes a LOT of stress off me when we work together as a team. Anyways, we discussed the baby thing again last night, and I told him my feelings on it. Every time I start to think about when we can try again, the month of August pops into my head. I feel that August gives us enough time to get this figured out, change our current situation, and that it would put a baby being born in a semester I don't have school. I told Spencer this, and he said it sounded like a good possibility and that we would consider it. I told him I feel like Heavenly Father has promised that once we get things squared away, and when it is the right time, I will have no trouble getting pregnant and keeping the pregnancy. I believe this without a doubt.

Hello

Well, not much in the world of not TTC right now. Got the bill for my HSG, and my insurance DID cover part of it, which I didn't think they would! So, the damage was only $600...waay better than what I was expecting!

Hello

Well, it's that time in the cycle when babies are made. Unfortunately no babies will be made this month. I haven't taken my temps all this cycle, or done and CM checking, but I am pretty sure today or tomorrow is O day. This makes me a little sad, there's a little voice in the back of my head whispering "But this could be the month!!" and I am trying my absolute hardest not to give in to it, and stick to our agreement to wait. It makes me very sad, and I feel like a ridiculous baby about it, but it's not fun having to wait for the thing that you want most. But like I said in the last post, I strongly believe that when we do decide it's the right time, we will have no trouble getting pregnant and keeping it. I just have to wait until then. I wish I had a fast forward button for my life. lol.

Try to find the silver lining.

I am a little bummed this morning. DH and I had a long conversation last night. We've dubbed Sunday nights to be our "discussion night" where we go over finances and the budget, and talk about anything else that we feel needs to be discussed. So we were looking over our quicken last night, and we became a little concerned.

DH works two jobs, and I am about to start school 3/4 time next week, plus we have a 2 year old. Our plates are pretty full. DH's second job has severely cut his hours (seriously, he's only worked 8 hours in the last two weeks) and we need him to be working the 20/week hours that he was promised in order to make ends meet. Needless to say, the outlook wasn't so great for the next few months, and while we would be ok, if we had to throw in more diapers into the budget, if for some reason I couldn't breastfeed again, we would have a hard time affording formula, and if for some reason our insurance didn't cover any of the cost (like with my son) we would be in a world of hurt.

So after a long discussion, lots of tears (on my end), some planning, and some prayer, we have decided not to have a baby at this point in time. I am devistated, but I am trying to find the silver lining. We still want one, and knowing it can only take a few months to get things situated again we aren't completely closing the door. We agreed that each Sunday when we go over our financial situation, we'll re-evaluate whether or not to try. That gives me a little hope that the door is not completely closed. It also motivates me to do all I can to fix things and make it so we can start trying again.

I went to bed last night a little angry. It just wasn't fair to me. Anytime we start making financial strides in the right direction, it feels like someone kicks us back down. We used to be very reckless with our money, but we've learned and are sooo much better with it, but yet it still feels like we are going nowhere. People get pregnant all the time when they can't afford the baby, and they turn to the government for help. I'm not saying that's wrong, but I just can't do that. It is an appealing idea to be able to do that, but maybe it's a pride issue, but I think other people need that more than us. I feel it is my responsibility to be able to provide for the children I bring into this world, because what if the gov't ceased to be?

So, yes, I went to bed angry last night. I think most of it was because I knew it was not a good time to have a baby, but yet I wanted it so badly I was refusing to see the long term perspective. I even said, and I am so ashamed to have said it, that "If God didn't want me to have a baby now, then he needs to stop making me feel like I should have one." I said it. I feel horrible, because that there is my problem. I am trying to pave my own path, when He already has one for me. I hate that it's not the time. I really do. So last night when I said my prayers, instead of asking for a healthy pregnancy, I asked to understand, and to have patience.

Though I am still upset about the decision, I feel that it is best. It is our job as parent to be financially responsible before bringing other life into the world. And I am not talking about being rich or anything, but able to meet the basic demands of having a family. I am ok with the decision. I know it is for the best, and I strongly feel like when it is the right time, I will have no problem getting and staying pregnant. It feels like something he's promised me.

There is a reason in all things, and I am starting to see that there is a lot I need to learn. This experience, these trials, they are for me right now, to teach me. So, I'm looking at the silver lining and I am going to grow from this. It will make me a better mom, wife and friend. I am facing these trials so that I can help someone in the future not endure them.

On a lighter note, I am a planner, and since I need something to plan, here is what I am going to take the time off from TTC to do:

1. Get fit. I WILL do the Jillian Michael's 30 Day shred. All 30 days.
2. Get my CNA license.
3. Change my diet. Reduce my meat intake, eat more veggies, and no soda. I am done!
4. MAYBE I'll go see a naturpath about a herbal regiment, but that's not a big issue right now.
5. Consider getting off my anti-depressants. I hate relying on a pill to feel good, but right now I am scared to get off them. I don't like myself off of them.

Sorry for the long novel post. It might be the last post in a while... I might blog about other things somewhat related to TTC, and keep you updated. So stay subscribed, that way you don't miss a thing!

HSG Test & Results

So, this morning bright and early I checked into the hospital for my HSG test. We went to the radiology wing and gave all our info. We only waited like 5 minutes, and the nurse (her name was Breezy by the way, and she was really cool) escorted me back to the xray room. She gave me a hospital gown and a robe to wear (the robe was a nice addition, I'm gonna ask for one when I'm in L&D) because I was completely covered up for a change! So, they had me lay on the x-ray table and they took an initial x-ray to see what shape my uterus was. After they did that, they scooted me all the way to the edge of the table and began the procedure.

First used the speculum to open the pathway the catheter would go through (just like a pap smear) then he swabbed my cervix with what looked like iodine to cleanse the area, then he filled a syringe with this yellowish-goo and then attached the syringe to a 12" metal looking tube and inserted it into my cervix. Now when I researched the procedure, everything I read said they used a balloon to hold the cervix open, but this thing had two little spikes that poke into the cervix to hold it open. As soon as he put it in it hurt. Immediately the cramping started, and then as soon as he injected the dye (the yellowish-goo) I was INTENSE pain!! My hubby held my hand and I'm sure his fingers hurt by the end of it. I tried so hard to breath through the pain, but it was very hard to do. I equate it with being in labor. It only took 5 minutes tops, but it felt like much longer.

So, the dye went in and they photgraphed it as they went. As soon as the procedure was done, he quickly removed the catheter and I was done. He let me sit up and pulled the monitor around so I could see the results. As soon as I sat up I felt like I was going to throw up, don't know if it was the pain, the laying down, or the cramping, but it was not a great feeling.

Anyways, on to the results. First thing he told me was that there was scar tissue on my cervix. He says it's probably from my son's birth, or from my D&C 8 months ago. He doesn't think that has anything to do with my reproductive health, it was just something he noticed. Another thing he said was I had a "severely tilted uterus" which means it tilts back more that it should, but again, it can make it a little bit tougher to conceive, it's not an issue, and there's really nothing they can do for it. Other than that, there are no fibroids or polyps in my uterus, my tubes are open and very clear, no scar tissue other than on the cervix (that means my D&C was done right!) so everything looked as it should! It's good to know that nothing is wrong in there. Below is an example of what I saw, This is NOT my scan, but one I found on google, that had the same results as me.

I cramped really badly for about an hour or two after the procedure and have a little bleeding, but it should be done by the end of today. The doc said he was concerned about my cervix if I keep bleeding, since those two spikes might have torn it, and therefore I would need stitches. I hope not!

But anywho...now I'm just waiting to do my retests for my blood work. Then it's on the the next phase. My doctor even suggested clomid already, but I don't know if we're ready for that yet. I'm more worried about finding out how to STAY pregnant.

Blood Test

So I called my doctor's office yesterday to see what was taking so long getting my blood results back. The nurse told me they had just gotten the results and that my doctor wanted to look them over first before they gave them to me. So, they were supposed to call me back but never did. So I called again today and guess what? The lab performed the wrong tests! Lucky me gets to go back in and get another 8 vials of blood drawn and I get to wait another 10 days-ish for the results. How sucky is that??

Oh well, atleast I have the HSG scheduled.

CD 2

Well, I've scheduled my HSG test for Thursday morning. I'm a little anxious about it, not in a good anxious though. Also asked the nurse at my Dr.'s office about my bloodwork and she said my Dr. was gonna look at it today and that she'd call me back. So, hopefully we'll hear back on that today.

Had a talk with the hubby last night about TTC and how sick and tired I am of it. I think this cycle we are going to take a break, and what I mean by that is, a break from charting, and counting cycle days and stuff. We are still gonna try to make one, but we are hoping that without the stress of TTC it will help. I plan on keeping my distance from the What to Expect message boards because those tend to make me a little stir crazy as well.

I also start school this month and from the looks of my textbook it is going to be a TON of information in a short amount of time, so hopefully I won't have time to concentrate on when I am ovulating. So, with this cycle, here is what we ARE going to do though:

1. I will continue to take my prenatal vitamins, extra folic acid.
2. Use preseed
3. DH will be taking extra vitamin C
4. Remedy anything they might find in my bloodwork/HSG test.

I will NOT:
1. Test till AF is due. That drove me insane this month. I am ridding my house of all pregnancy tests before the time comes to test.
2. Chart my temps
3. Check my CM
4. Look at a calender to see what CD I am on.

Hopefully, this non-plan-of-attack will catch the eggy by surprise!! LOL

Happy Mothers Day!

Just wanted to wish all my readers a happy mothers day! Whether you are a mother already, or are TTC your first, you are still a mother, and a woman and should be celebrated today! I love being a mother to my 2 year old, he is the reason for most of the things I do. I just love him!

I thought today was going to be a tough day for me, I thought I would reflect on my past pregnancies and stuff and be all resentful, but surprisingly I'm not. I'm happy today. My son is my miracle baby and I am so blessed to even have him amongst the other troubles I've had TTC. Though I still am sad about all the miscarriages, I don't regret having them. I have been a mother 5 times, though some were very short. Here is a poem I got from my friend's blog a while back, and I think it is fitting for today. I have it framed in my bedroom, she had just posted it shortly after my 14wk miscarriage, and I really needed to hear it.

Angel Babies

I thought of you and closed my eyes
And prayed to God today
I asked “What makes a mother”?
And I know I heard him say.

“A mother has a baby”
This we know is true
“But God can you be a mother,
When your baby is not with you”?

“Yes, you can”, He replied
with confidence in his voice
“I give many woman babies,
when they leave is not their choice”

Some I send for a lifetime,
and other for the day.
And some I send to feel your womb,
but there’s no need to stay.

“I just don’t understand this God
I want my baby here.”
He took a deep breath and cleared his throat,
and then I saw a tear.

“I wish I could show you
what your child is doing today
If you could see your child’s smile,
with all the other children and say…

“We go to earth to learn our lessons,
of love and life and fear.
My mommy loved me so much,
I got to come straight here.

I feel so lucky to have a Mom,
who had so much love for me,
I learned my lessons quickly,
My mommy set me free.

I miss my mommy oh so much,
but I visit her every day.
When she goes to sleep,
On her pillows where I lay.

I stroke her hair and kiss her cheek,
And whisper in her ear.
“Mommy don’t be sad today,
I’m your baby and I’m here”.

“So you see my dear sweet ones,
Your children are okay.
Your babies are born here in My home,
And this is where they’ll stay.

They’ll wait for you with Me,
Until your lessons through,
And on the day that you come home,
They’ll be at the gate for you

HAPPY MOTHERS DAY!

#16

Well, here's to another cycle, cycle #16!
This will put me due to test on my husband's birthday. That would be sweet if I got a BFP to give him!
AF reared her ugly head today and boy is she making herself known. I HURT today. :P

Yesterday I was mad, but today I am optimistic and ready for another try. I will have my HSG test in the next few days so I will fill you guys in on that when it happens!

RESULTS

I took a FRER test...and....


BFN


What a crappy day. I expect a visit from Auntie anytime now. Grrr.

14DPO

Well folks, today is the day.
I cannot bring myself to test yet.
AF is usually right on schedule, so I'm testing between 1-2pm if she doesn't show.
I have complete mixed feelings about what will happen.
I have been sooo certain this whole month I am, but now I am overcome with doubts.
I have been journaling any "symptoms" I feel like I've had, but I won't share them till later.
Yesterday I was so dizzy I was afraid to drive.
14 DPO....in past charts my temps crashed by now, so far they are still up...
Oh gosh I am making myself insane! Really!

Stay Tuned.

Funny Song

This is so funny. No offense to my pregnant friends, I just got a good laugh out of it!

Dream

Last night I had a dream that I got a positive pregnancy test. It was SO realistic and vivid. In the dream I was beside myself with excitement and I kept telling everyone that I KNEW I was pregnant. The pee stick in my dream was so clear and real. When I woke up I had a split second of excitement before I realized it was a dream. Then I was disappointed that it was only a dream. That was totally unfair for me to dream that lol. Well, in the dream the BFP came on 12 DPO, so maybe it will happen, but I am not testing till Saturday morning. I can wait. I can wait. I can wait. lol. I am seriously crazy. Maybe I should invest in a dream catcher. hehe

The Main Reason

Sometimes when I think about having another baby I get very overwhelmed. I have a two year old and he has more energy bottled up inside him than a roman candle. He refuses to potty train even though he knows what he is supposed to do, he wakes me up at the crack of dawn every morning, and he talks every minute of the day he is awake. He exhausts me. How on earth would I be able to manage 2 of him? When I was pregnant last summer with pregnancy #4, I had these thoughts a lot. I hate to admit that I was a little less thrilled about the fact I was pregnant - Even though we had been trying actively for months. Once the reality hit me that I was actually going to have another baby I got very stressed out. Since that loss, I have realized more than ever that I would love another child. And the main reason I am excited for that, is my son.

As tiring and exhausting as he is, he is the light of my world. Nothing in this world makes me happier than being his Mommy. I love that it is my name he calls out when he has a bad dream, or when he has a boo boo. I love that he comes up to me randomly and kisses my arm or cheek. I love watching him grow and learn. I never would have guessed the joy I would feel when someone said their first sentance ("What do you want?" in this case :)). The fact that I taught him his colors, and that he can pick out certain letters off of the signs in front of stores, the fact that he can tell me what animals say... it is amazing to see that I played a roll in that. I am so proud of all the things he is learning to do every day. I think he is so cute sometimes I just want to squeeze the heck out of him. He gets so much attention everywhere we go because of his massive eyelashes and big brown eyes. I just love nothing more than being his mother.

The reason I am trying to have baby number 2, may be selfish, but I want to feel that feeling x2. I want to be a Mom to another baby. I want Cohen to know the joy there is in having brothers and sisters. There is a hole in our family that needs to be filled, and that hole is very prominent in my eyes and is almost shouting at me to fill it. I cannot wait for this dream to become a reality. I deserve this. Cohen deserves this. Our family deserves this. Am I wrong for thinking we deserve something? At the risk of striking a nerve with someone, we have gone about having our family the right way. We dated, got married, then had a baby. We've gotten our insurance straight, made sure we are financially able to care for a baby, and made all those necessary preparations before trying for #2. We've gone about this all the right way, so why hasn't it happened for us? That is why I think we deserve this. And I know it's all up to God and his will, and truly I understand it and trust it will happen in his time, but the natural woman in me can't help but feel that way. Anyways, thanks for listening to another vent. Chao!

Grrr

So I was playing around with my family blog and I realized I never removed the pregnancy ticker from my last pregnancy. :( I guess I would be 26 weeks today. I wish pregnancy went by as fast as non-pregnancy. lol. So yea, I'm a little sad about that. It's better to not know how pregnant I'd be right now if I could just keep a baby. Grrrr.

A Fun Read & Update

I came across this book at the library, it's called The Conception Chronicles. I was pleased to find a book about TTC, that wasn't all text-booky. This one is raw, blunt humor about the roller coaster of TTC. It was so funny at some times. I really enjoyed reading it, I read it cover to cover in a day.Some of my favorite highlights from the book:

On the topic of Timed Intercourse: "Since when did sex have to be special for him? In your old life, your husband could have one leg caught in a bear trap and would still somehow manage to have sex if you showed even the slightest interest." Absolutely hilarious, and true! lol

"Slutty Saturdays"- Trying to make the baby marathon less work by trying to spice up the romance with lingerie? It gets tiring when your 3 day window turns into 10 days of safety net, dubbing Saturday as "Slutty Saturday" reserving that to be the only day you have to strap yourself into something that doubles as a rock climbing harness. (I love this, it is so funny to me)

There's also a chapter about how to deal with "Fertile Foes" and those are the women who flaunt their obvious fertility in your face. That's a good chapter b/c I've encountered my fair share of those!!

Anywho...just my lil' book review. Enjoy!

BTW, I'm 9DPO today...just a few more days till testing! I can't say for sure if I feel pregnant or not though. Like every month I've gone back and forth and can't really say for sure. As far as symptoms go, I have a little nausea that started yesterday, and I pee a lot, but that one isn't such a good sign or not b/c I have waaay too much juice in my fridge and I always have a drink nearby. I was starving the other day only 10 minutes after I was full, and I've been a little on the sleepy side, which again isn't a good indicator since my 2 year old wakes me up daily at the crack of dawn by putting his nose against my nose and says "Mommy. Wake up!" LOL. Only time will tell. Very tempted to hit up the pharmacy and get me a first response since those are the most accurate test and give an early response, but I have sworn to wait until AF is due to test, which will be Saturday. I can do this!! lol.

Answers.

So I went and saw my new OBGYN today. I'd heard great things about him, and that he also has a special interest in fertility. I've wanted to see him for a while, but we just got insurance that he accepts, so I made an appointment as soon as I could! Today was my appointment and I went over my medical history with him, and we lingered on the topic of pregnancy and my 4 miscarriages and he was very surprised that I still had not had any tests done to see what is going on. I told him that my doctor basically would tell me to try to get pregnant and then they would see how my body handled it and he was not thrilled about that.

So he explained to me that new findings show that a 20% of repeat miscarriages are caused by clotting disorders like thrombophilia. Basically a clot forms in the placenta and eventually destroys the pregnancy. He said that since I had a 2nd trimester miscarriage it made it even more likely that this could be a problem for me. So they drew 8 vials of blood today and sent them off to the lab to be tested. If it does happen that I do have a blood clotting disorder, when I do get pregnant I get to take 2 shots a day of a medicine called heparin throughout the entire pregnancy and through postpartum recovery. Not looking forward to that, but if it gets me a baby I'm all for it. And this made me wonder, since I had my son and the only "complication" was mild preeclampsia onset at the end of my pregnancy, why wasn't this possible disorder a problem? He told me that it can not only be genetic, but acquired at later points in life, so I could have acquired it after my son was born, but that gives no explanation to my 2 miscarriages before him. Anyways, we'll know in about 3-5 days the results.

He also told me if I am not pregnant now, than once I start my cycle again to call and schedule an HSG test (Hysterosalpingogram) which is where they inject dye into my uterus and it flows up the fallopian tubes and then they take an x-ray of it. They look for misshapen uterus, blocked tubes, or anything in the uterus like a fibroid, polyp, or scarring that prevents the embryo from properly implanting. He said sometimes the dye that is injected can clear out any blockages in the tubes, remove scar tissue, and basically aid in the process of getting pregnant. I heard it is a little painful and uncomfortable, but the results are usually pretty good- conception wise.

If all those come back normal we'll do a semen analysis, and then he suggests genetic testing to make sure neither of us have any genetic defects that are causing repeat miscarraiges.

Well, HOPEFULLY I am pregnant now, and these things will not be necessary. Well, except for the blood clotting thing, because if they came back positive I'd get on those shots right away.

I am very relieved, even excited at the chance to get some answers. Who knows, they all might come back normal and there's nothing wrong with me, but atleast this will remove any doubt! I am due to test a week from tomorrow and I am going to try with all my might to resist the urge to pee on a stick until then. We shall see! Wish me luck folks!

Go Green. Or Red. Or Blue...

I'm always looking for a remedy or things to help in the fertility department, and one thing that I was curious about this week was gemstones and their relationship to fertility. For ages gemstones have been known to have healing powers, and meanings. I know that, for instance Citrine is supposed to ward off evil thoughts, Amethyst is supposed to prevent intoxication, and that Garnet is supposed to ensure safe travels (ironic that Noah on the Ark had a garnet inside the ark?). I've seen pieces of jewelry out there labeled as "fertility jewelry" and it sparked my interest. Being a jewelry maker myself, I figured if there was any reality to these gemstones having healing effects, then maybe I could whip myself up a piece and get pregnant! So first I did some research on what stones to use, and I've found several options.

1. One person said that any green stone can help promote fertility. I think in theory the green color symbolizes life, renewal, nature, and so forth. This is lucky for a lot of people because there is a huge variety of green gemstones available. Some good choices are Jade, Emerald, and even garnets and opals.2. Moonstone is a hormone balancing stone that is associated with feminine energy and brings balance to the menstrual cycle and synchronizes it to that on the moon. You can make a fertility elixir by placing a moon stone in purified water and leaving it outside at night under the moonlight. It should be left outside for at least a couple of hours on a clear night. Remove the stone and use the water as healing elixir by drinking it.I thought this was kind of interesting. Don't know if I'll try it, but it's interesting to say the least! 3.Carnelian- Boosts fertility, Promotes sexuality and planned reproduction, Stimulates, balances and heals the uterus, ovaries, fallopian tubes, cervix and vagina, Alleviate premenstrual syndrome, irregular cycles and cramps by helping to rebalance reproductive hormones. 4. Rose Quartz- The stone of love, the first necessary stepping stone to creating a healthy baby. 5. Pearls – These are the most closely tied gems to fertility. Since oysters are natures aphrodisiac, it would seem that the pearl would also contain some of those properties. Lastly, it is thought that since it requires patience and time to create a pearl, just like the patience and time required to create a baby, is why the pearl is so powerful to fertility
6. Rubies are thought to prevent miscarriages.

When I researched "Gemstone Therapy" it basically calls for programming your gemstones, basically palming them, and stating some kind of mantra like "These gemstones will heal me, and bring me a healthy baby, or pregnancy." Then it says to place the gemstones on your body, near your ovaries, uterus, on your temples, and lay in a dark place and meditate for 15-20 minutes about the outcome you desire. It is supposed to help with all kinds of afflictions, not just infertitily. I would think it's worth a shot.

Also, the shape of the gemstone doesn't necessarily matter, but they suggest round, oval, heart, or egg shaped gemstones to have the best effect.

To purchase your own gemstones, visit your local craft store, like Michaels or JoAnnes. Most gems are available on a string, but you can also purchase individual pendants. Also, two good online stores are www.artbeads.com (free shipping) and www.firemountaingems.com.

There are many places on the web where you can purchase fertility jewelry. I've planned a fertility line to offer on my store and that will be coming soon. For now, I plan to scavage my jewelry box and see what I have that can give me a boost!

Just a lil' update

Well, either today or tomorrow should be O day. Yay! Then it's another 2ww. This cycle has been kinda bleh for me because of the strep throat, I haven't really cared to much or done anything besides charting my temps. Who knows, maybe the lack of trying will be the key. lol. Anyways, CD 15 today... let's hope we have better luck this month!!

King Henry VIII would have no patience for me...

So, there's a show I like to watch called "The Tudors." It's basically the story of Henry VIII's reign and his many wives. He was married to Catherine of Aragon for many years, they had a daughter but after her, she had many miscarriages and still births. Then He married Anne Boelyn, and she has a daughter, Elizabeth, and then has a late miscarriage, which would have been a boy. The king then beheads her- not only because she didn't give him a son, but other reasons too. Then comes Jane Seymore, who dies in childbirth... and the cycle continues.

If I were at court back in that time and Henry married me, he might just have me divorced or beheaded b/c of the difficulty I have to get pregnant and carry a healthy baby. Yep. I guess it's a good thing I was born in 1987 and not the 1500's. haha.

Sorry, just a random thought. Getting over this strep throat just in time for BDing!

Hello friends. It has been a little bit since I've posted last...mainly because I've been out of town and then dealing with a lovely case of strep throat. The Strep came on so fast! I went to Utah on Friday, drove back on Saturday, and by Saturday night I was feeling "off" and Sunday I hurt everywhere...even my toes ached. It was so miserable. I kinda just laid around the house and slept and my fever rose to 105.5. So Monday I went to the doctor and they confirmed it was strep and gave me some antibiotics, so hopefully I'll be feeling better here really soon. The aches are gone, all that hurts is my throat and my head. Bleh. Thank goodness for my SIL who watched Cohen all day yesterday, that made it possible for me to rest all day. I have atleast 3 days until ovulation so hopefully this will all clear up in time to catch that egg!! Anywho...more bloggage later, I'm still kinda tired.